Welcome to the column. I'm Dan and this column is for the only Edgucated site on the net owned by the only webmistress cool enough to edit it.

First of all, congratulations to Amy on her move to Fort Lauderdale, Atlanta or Outer Mongolia. We hope she's very happy and that she enjoys the Mongolian food, the lucky girl.

Adam and Amy kicked off RAW on the Rated R announce table (not literally, they were just commentating). I thought there might be a live sex celebration on it but the closest we might have got to that is King and JR so that er... never happened. But yeah, they kicked it off with a Shelton vs Cena match with Adam and Amy on commentary to commence more Shelton burial but making for some funny scenes between the Rated R couple. King wondered if they were going to have live sex and therefore, cause Vince to hire an underground bunker for the hate mail he would receive from several areas of the fandom.

Edge distracted Cena, Lita grabbed Cena's leg and Edge kicked the living crap out of him. There ya go, who said teamwork is dead? Looks like Crazy Leets ain't sick of the ol' Edgemeister yet despite the best complaining of several people.

Then they said we were going to a hotel and maybe Live Sex (incidentally, the highest rated segment in years) would take place and we'd be treated to a month long argument all over the net about Edge's "size." But alas no, they just signed in with Edge being delightfully rude to the guy with the bowl hairdo. Adam and Amy had a moment where Adam suggested she go to the bar and wait for him (with cute "rarr" sound thrown in) and then Edge showed the hotel dude why life would just be so much better for him if he did what Edge wanted. The champ is here, so new world order (not the faction).

While the Internet recharged its batteries to shout "OMG! They should split up!" or "OMG! Adam and Amy hate working together!" because of what their source Damien McLucifer told them, we had some really cool segments with Nick Dinsmore seeing his career literally evaporate in front of him and Heyman being disgustingly odious. We also saw Stifler from American Pie announce the Diva Search 2006. Hoo bloody rah indeed.

So we go back to Adam and Amy and they're pretty into each other as they have a few drinks at the bar to put hairs on their chest. They are told their room for same Rated R lovin' is ready and Adam necks his drink while Amy sips hers, raising a toast to the Rated R champion. It's good being on top of the game. Woman you love, title over your shoulder. You did alright, Copeland!

Then, the room segment where sections of the frenzied online community curl into the foetal position and I start laughing as we see Adam and Amy all over each other. Hilarious when they get going! Anyway, Jeeves comes by but with no champagne. One can't have a Rated R celebration without champagne as Edge points out to the monosyllabic waiter. The waiter is sent on his way and Adam and Amy have more time together, rolling around the sofa, enjoying themselves. Then there's a knock on the door and in comes Cena and part of you is thinking "thank Christ for that" because the man whose title reign was the dullest RAW has seen in years does not need to get the belt back at SNME. The booking seems to be halfway competent this time as Edge is beaten to within an inch of his life and of course, Lita screamed and left the room so of course "they're splitting up and Lita's gonna get back with Matt and they're gonna have lots of babies!" Someone forgot to tell Adam and Amy that but I digress because Edge is being thrown across the room and over glass before Cena smashes him with the belt in between a speech about good eating.

No Live Sex then, causing half of the people to dance and think, "Yes, we've beaten those pesky sexoholics" without realising the "sexaholics" don't actually give a damn and are currently laughing and half of us to think "Well, who cares? Adam and Amy. Edge and Lita. WWE title. Great skit. A long title reign." What more could you want? Of course, this might end at SummerSlam when the WWE decide to make Cena the three-time-although-it-seems-like-a-hundred time champion. Whatever next.

All I know is that Ledgeheads all over the world will enjoy. You can bank on that!